I like the idea of randomness. For the last blow up, I want some random word and will decide what to do with it after that; and this is why I love the Internet, because there is an application that generates random words for you. The random word I am given is “Throughput.” I need to consult Webster since I’ve never heard of this word nor used it in any conversation. Webster does not let me down: “technical : the amount of material, data, etc., that enters and goes through something (such as a machine or system).” Interesting. Now what picture goes with Throughput:
It seems like a necessary idea to have charts based on how much your application can handle and more importantly output, based on the amount of traffic it receives. Good word Throughput is. Now, another random video generated from Pandora One randomized playlists (please be a good song). Deciding to forgo the first two Christmas songs, the next song is a good one:
Latest
Blog Blow Up 4: A.K.A. Dr. Seuss Challenge
So, my friend over there, somewhere up there in Philly gave me a bird. It was such a thoughtful present, I thought I would return the favor.
We are done sir, done as done can be
don’t you see you and I are like
Tweedledumb and Tweedledee
although they could not fly
they could see that we
are done sir, done as done can be.
You might not agree, sir
that we are done, done as done can be;
rumor has it some show Glee has surpassed
our rankings and our blogs are, one might say
dismally, painfully in need of surgery.
So, how shall we add spirit to this writing spree
so in the end, sir, the finale is not me repeating
we are done sire, done as done can be?
Blog Blow Up 3
Hm, some random picture is needed next. Creekside Blues is what I will use in Google’s search engine now. The first photo shows a group of people listening/watching a live blues/jazz show outside in Columbus, Ohio. It looks like a cool festival (*putting on to-do list*).
All this reminds me of one of my favorite jazz songs: Sing, Sing, Sing (With a Swing) by Benny Goodman: Yeah! Let’s dance all night long, let me see you swing like ain’t nothing wrong! Honey, let me move you, groove you, shake you but so tender as not to break you! Baby, you’re all mine on the dance floor tonight with the lights shining and glowing bright and you flying through my mind, let’s just unwind, rewind, repeat and do all again! Let ‘em sing, sing, sing, and then we’ll swing, swing, swing…
Blog Blow Up 2
Someone once said a quotation, yes, a quotation, not a quote. In proper grammar it it ALWAYS a quotation–never ever, never ever, a quote. One can say, he was “quoted” as saying or she “quotes” Shakespeare in her sleep, but one should never use quote as the noun form of the word quotation. Done. (And yes, that is an intentional fragment.) Anyway, if you Google “good quotations,” you come across a web-site that reads “Good Quotation by Famous people,” run by Dr. Gabriel Robins, computer science professor at UVA.
The first quotation on his page reads: “Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.”
– H. G. Wells (1866-1946)
That is a good quotation; interpret it as you will. I am moving on. Oh yes, with another video (to get this, I will meander toward Pandora and put all playlists on random and pick the first songs video that comes on): WHAT!?! This is ridiculous; I don’t even listen to Drake…
Blog Blow Up 1
In commemoration of the recent blow-up of my friend’s blog, I will blow my blog up as well, however, unlike his, none of the stuff involved in the blow-up will be own original thought, except these brief words…
First off, a beautiful rendition of a good song:
I Don’t Even Know
This blog really isn’t for whoever may stumble across this or really anyone, this blog is for me, to help me figure out my thoughts. I’m on a writing stroll, so why stop? This week, I confessed my affection toward the woman I adore this week. She has a boyfriend, but timing has always been bad for me in regards to relationships and I am not the type of guy to barge in with a confident swagger and tell all immediately–many men will, with the excuse that if she doesn’t have a ring, go for it. Personally I hate that idea because who knows, I may be on the opposite end of that idea one day, and the damage that does for so many promising relationships. Either way, ever since day one when I first met her, I felt guilty for liking her because she had a boyfriend. I would not even say it’s a case of desiring something I can’t have. I loathe jealously, a favorite quotation of mine: “Don’t waste your time on jealously. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.” It is such a true statement and one I truly stand by. There are, after all, almost 7 billion people in the world all vying for the various things. When I think about it, I’ve always felt guilty about liking some women because I usually get them to tell me who they are fond of and once they tell me, it gives me a reason not to pursue them because they like someone else never assuming it will ever be me. However, in no ways am I assuming she feels the same way about me as I do about her.
In all cases till now, if I meet someone new and they already have a boyfriend, something is triggered in my mind and I make a concerted effort not to increase my fondness for them, except from a strictly platonic standpoint and nothing usually goes beyond that. Somehow it works all the time. What has bothered me since I met, let’s call her Juanita, is that I haven’t been able to set off that platonic trigger in my head and it is with complete intentionality in trying not to adore her anymore than I already do that this has happened; it may because of all the uncanny similarities that exist between us added to my trying so hard not to think about her that I am, inadvertently and obviously thinking more about her. And for this reason, I felt/still feel guilty for liking her. In the end, I suppose as it was once famously written somewhere the man does not control the heart, rather the heart controls the man. With that guilt, I told her I did not want to interfere and fuck up what she and her current boyfriend have going for them and I truly hope the best of happiness for both of them. That idea was challenged by her because I never met her boyfriend, but I don’t feel you have to meet somebody to appreciate the goodness of humanity in them, and I can still wish the best to someone I never met. My subconscious desire (which really makes me feel like a jerk and more guilty) is fighting my conscious desire and belief that the betterment of many is far superior to the betterment of one. In this case that idea balances out since there really aren’t many. With that assumption, two people remain happy and one remains content and continues to pursue philosophical pronunciations. Yet still I can’t shake the guilt, but hopefully someday–does it make me too empathetic or too cowardly? I simply write all this to think out loud and sort through the cobwebs upstairs.
The World is a Big, Scary Place…to a Chinchilla
A.K.A. Another Rant:
In the past seven days, I seemed to have seen the best and worst of humanity and this is me writing to make sense of it all. In reality, I have only seen a small glimpse of mankind, but my empathetic emotions as a human being have struggled in still believing in the goodness of people and equally hating them at the same time.
I avoid watching the news simply for the fact that ratings, viewings, money, and competition play such a huge role in what is shown, it seems like every news hour is a race to see who can cover the most shootings and car accidents; it truly is sensationalism at its finest. I avoid shows (television in general, I loathe) like CSI, the defunct Law and Order, NCIS, whatever involves an excessive amount of crime and post-investigating. I mention this because in Media and Social studies, a phenomenon known as “Scary World Syndrome” exists which states that viewers of shows like these (I also add news shows into this category) and others develop a scary world mentality, to say that an event like they see on television will likely happen to them, their neighbor or their family. People are brutally murdered everyday and a killer lurks on every corner (although, point aside, in reality, a sexual offender lives on every corner, more or less); so goes the scary world syndrome.
So these viewers live in a terrified world, where they lock their doors at all times of day, don’t go into certain parts of town–ever–make sure their kids aren’t out after dusk, walk around with mace, short of carrying a concealed AK-47. In some instances people are justified in being cautious; in fact, caution has saved lives before, but this is why I loathe the news and other shows. When news stories surface of a shooting, rape, burglary, etc, the news embellishes entirely WAY too long and go over the top in reporting the story–case in point: almost EVERY single major news story outside of politics, foreign affairs, and Hollywood last year. This only perpetuates and adds to the scary world syndrome–after days and days of court hearings, interviews with victims families, public reactions, to some it gives them plenty reason to practice their 2nd amendment rights.
Shit happens, but it doesn’t happen every hour of every day, like the news shows it. Back to my main point, a fellow employee of mine had $80 stolen from her purse a few nights (literally her first night on the job) ago by another (now former) employee. First point to catch a thief: Scare the SHIT out of them. We locked the place down, called the police and talked to every employee on that shift: give us the money before midnight or face the state police investigators. After hearing the news, I do two things: 1) publicly give everyone the benefit of the doubt–”Have you found any money dropped or seen any lying around–accuse no one, 2) personally start developing my list of suspects based on access and personality. On a side note, after notifying my superior, the first words out of his mouth: “Man, somebody stole that shit,” further confirming what I believed. Unfortunately, no money was given to me before midnight, but was returned a few days later after police interrogated (and continued to scare the shit out of) the suspect after finding the suspects fingerprint’s on the woman’s purse and wallet. There is still yet no cure for stupidity (although the French are close simply to avoid extinction) no matter how desperate one might be for money. We terminated the employee and moved on.
My reason for simply wanting to hate people occurred last night. On my way back to my truck, I witnessed a group of white college boys (yes, I will use the more derogatory reference of boys) beating on one of their “acquaintances.” Drunk? More than likely. Equally stupid? An emphatic yes. I called police and they investigated and I didn’t stick around the see what happened. In both cases, immaturity and alcohol go a long way (well, a short way), although in the first alcohol played no role, just immaturity and stupidity. When all this is behind me, I will love to elaborate. This all discourages me until I think of all the ridiculousness of it all.
Last semester, after another fellow employee noticed some students come into the cafe who had stolen food before, he notified me and we waited to see what might happen. They ordered their food, which would take about 10 minutes because of how they wanted it prepped and sat two booths away from a door. I waited till they were almost served and called the police. One officer, a little pissed that I called them over “suspecting” they might steal food mouthed off a bit until I pointed over to the recently deserted booth they had been sitting at until the police showed up. Now, common sense says they may have gotten away with it by paying for the food or making up some lie as to what they had planned for the food–running is never a good idea–again no cure for stupidity. Needless to say all this continues to add to my already calloused nature. You try to steal shit from me, I am going to take it personally and defame (well, further defame your name since you already did so yourself) your name in a blog (unless all investigations, hearings and proceedings are pending, which they are); not that blogging really has any impact, but I like to write, and I’m pacifist with am edge for activism and fighting sometimes.
All this could technically get me fired if only I had mentioned my employer, but I will refrain and continue to share stories and vent as need be. At the beginning of this piece I was pissed and resentful, but now I am amused at the misfortunes others bring upon themselves sometimes. So, scary world syndrome exists to a degree, but people are still stupid and can only get away with so much.
The Subtle Montage of Life
Can I share her beauty?
Like the tingling glimmer
of ivory keys beneath her fingers,
as she sits and flows back and forth
notes, vibrato and humming.
Can I share her beauty?
Like the bare feet beneath
threadbare jeans, slow
walking across the thin green
blades of grass that comfort
rather than pierce.
Can I share her beauty?
Like that look in her eye
as she seeks strength
in the pancakes and utters
“sorry, we tried”–beauty
in strength she cannot share.
I still love her and always will.
One Awesome Video
I hate advertising, marketing and other elements that clog up our mental arteries with images and whimsical fancies of random shit we don’t need; however, although I won’t ever buy the camera, this is just one fucking awesome video:
